One knitter's battle to conquer the intended gauge . . .

Monday, March 10, 2014

Hearts Knit Together #35: Cocoa Cookies and Motherhood Cheerleading

"Motherhood should be a hand in hand, 
walking side by side, cheerleading each other on journey"
-Rachel Marie Martin on Finding Joy








Jude and I made these cocoa cookies, substituting out the carob with cocoa powder. They were fun and different but not a new favorite around here. While waiting for the cookies to bake the boys had a blast playing with the turkey baster. Some how most of my kitchen tools end up being used as toys of some kind. They were very excited about their little set up in the bathroom sink. These boys are pretty creative with their play. Jude is becoming quite a helper in the kitchen and rarely do I bake anything without his help anymore. This is not surprising. This boy LOVES food.  

My sister posted the link at the top from Rachel's article on Finding Joy, on Facebook a few weeks ago and it put into words what I have been thinking a bit about lately. She talks about how motherhood isn't meant to be a lonely adventure but a community of women supporting each other. And I wonder how you feel we are doing as a community of mothers? Do you feel supported by the other mothers in your sphere? How do you provide support to other mothers?

This all came to mind after I received this text from a friend this week. 

"In your other homes and places you lived in,
 did you ever have a group of girls or friends that made you feel insecure 
or inadequate as a mom? Or the things you were doing as a mom?"

I ended up giving her the answer that of course she is a good mom and no one can make you feel inadequate without your consent. And maybe she needs to find better friends. What would you have said? I discussed Rachel's article. And really most of Rachel's posts on Finding Joy are pretty inspiring. 

But I have been thinking a lot about my friend's questions and it angers me that as mothers we are not more supportive of each other. I think that generally we are all doing the best we know how for our children. We are not purposefully trying to screw up our children's lives, though some of them may end up in therapy as adults anyway :). I parent and respond differently to each of my children's behaviors than some friends and family. But I respond in the way that I feel is best for that child. Because every child has different needs. If you have more than one child, I am sure you have realized that what works with one, isn't always best for the next. And sometimes we are just having a really bad day and we don't respond to our children in the way we want to. All mothers have those days and deserve grace from those who witness it. Let us give out less unsolicited parenting advice and more words of support and encouragement.  

Happy Monday!!

4 comments:

  1. Love love love this! More support and less judgement.

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  2. Hear Hear! Good advice - find better friends! I try to teach my children to choose very carefully the people they let into their lives and who they mix with. The people you surround yourself with in life can make a big difference to the type of life you have and ultimately it is up to us, as you say to either give consent or not to how we are treated. Find people who help you to feel confident and supported...they are out there....and avoid those who want to put others down. Like you, I often ask why can't people be more supportive of each other and work together.

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    Replies
    1. That is good advice to give your children. Thank you for sharing it.

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